THe Great Employer
by Saiyan Chick
Summary: Duo and Quatré encounter some strange people........R
1. Default Chapter

Chapter 1: Duo meets a lot of strange peopleDuo Maxwell and QuatrŽ I-don't-know-his-last-name were in Duo's living room playing with slinkys."I am the great employer!" Duo Maxwell said proudly, putting down his blue slinky."Uhh don't you mean the great destroyer?" QuatrŽ asked from his Lazy Boy chair."No, I'm gonna employ people to entertain me." Duo said.QuatrŽ: But you don't have enough money! And why do you need to be entertained all of the sudden? wait! why did the format just change? And why wasn't that last sentence caapitalized?Duo: Who knows. Anyway, once I find the funniest most entertaining person, I will hire them and pay them with potted plants. I will get the plant's from my friend who has a potted plant farm in Okinawa.QuatrŽ: Uhhh.....kay. But what are you gonna do with all of these slinkeys Relina left at your house?Duo: I'm going to trade them to android 16 for plant fertilizer. I can't pay my employees with dead plants.QuatrŽ: But isn't Android 16 from a different show?Duo: Who cares! I make the rules in this fanfic.QuatrŽ: How come you get to make the rules?Duo: Because my hair is longer and I'm more popular AND I wasn't born in a test tube.QuatrŽ; Can't argue with that.The next day, Duo held try outs for his entertainer.Duo: Next!Yoda: Make you laugh I will. Use the force I must.Her her. And after i get maany potted plants, I will use them to take over the minds of Fish and small children! mwahahahahahah!Duo: (Sweating) Yeah. I'll call you.Next!Mr. Fluffy Wuffy:(y'know the one from the fanfic by Eevee) Ahh! Water!!!!!!!!! YOu are water!!!!!!!!!!!! You...................Must...............die.........................................!!!!!!!!!(Mr. Fluffy Wuffy colapsed in convulsion of fear and pain)Duo: Next!!!!!!!!Sailor Jupiter: Nock Nock!Duo: WHo's there?S.J.: LitaDuo: Lita who?S.L.: Lita Makoto!!!! Funny huh? I actually said my last name!!!! Get it?? OH SHOOT!!!!!!!!!!!!! I gave out my secret identity!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Now I'm gonna have to kill you!!!!!!!Duo: Uh oh. Mr. Fluffy Wuffy! Help!!!!!!!!!Mr. Fluffy Wuffy: (Still in convulsions) Gnnnnaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!! Waterrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!!Duo: (Picks up Mr. Fluffy Wuffy and chucks it at Sailor Jupiter) Don't mess with the great employer!!!!!!!!!!!!Mr Fluffy Wuffy lands on Sailor Jupiter's face, tearing her to pieces.Jay: I'll save you!!!!!!!!! (Leaps on Mr. Fluffy Wuffy and manages to keep it kind of still while Sailor Jupiter uses Jupiter oak evolution on it just after Jay jumped clear Just like in PokŽmon when Pikachu saved Ash's hat from Charmander..................)QuatrŽ: (Suddenly appears) Who is Jay?Duo: The author's younger brother.QuatrŽ: How would you know?Duo: I make the rules in this fic, remember?QuatrŽ: Oh yeah. (sighs)Duo: On with the show. Who's next?Jim Hawking (from Outlaw star): I'm gonna sing a song that I wrote myself. It is called:Peace love and Heroine. Here it goes:I love my Heeeeerrroine!!!!!!!! I take it iin the showerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!It makes me Happpppppppppppppppppppppppppppyyyyyyyyyyyy and it makess me hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(Jim's voices cracks) Duo: uhhh.........kay.QuatrŽ: Hey you stole my line. I said that a while ago.Zechs: (trudges iin) Jim........I............need.......some.......joints...............and.............some.................sweet................love....................baby..................................(colapses iin a heap) got.............any.......hornyness.........................left? (Sudders and dies)Jim: Poor sap. He was like......a mother to me..........(Bursts into tears and runs out of Duo's house)Duo: NextEddy from Ed Edd and Eddy wlks in accompaanied by Ed and Edd.Eddy: Alright, double PEdd: It's double D. My name is spelled with two d's, not Ps.Ed: Barnicle Freddy saves the day!Jay: (Charges in and tackles Ed) You said Freddy!!!!!!! Prepare to die!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (gnaws Ed's head off and slerps up his blood) Ha!!!!!! Scooby Doo Freddy.......you're next!! Mwahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!Duo: I give up. Nobody has any talent around here.Just then Imhotep from The Mummy comes in.Imhotep: Have you seen my girlfriend?Duo: d'know, what's she look like.Imhotep: Well she has long black hair, no clothes and gold makeup.Duo: Yeah, I think I did. I'll go get her. (Runs into his basement and finds Sailor Mini Moon bound and gagged. He takes off her clothes, dies her hair black and puts gold makeup on her. Then comes out with her)Imhotep: Oh thank you!! (Eyes all glittery. Then turns to Saailor Mini Moon) Were have you been all off those thousands of years??!!Mini Moon: What do you meen? I'm Mini Moon. (Imhotepp drags her away screamiing) Duo: Yes! I finaally got rid of her!!!!!!! (Don't ask)Then Imperfect Cell walks iinCell: Have you seen an androoid around with blonde hair?Duo: Hey I have! I'll go get her. (Duo ran off and constructed an exact replica of android 18 out of slinkeys in ten seconds) Here you go.Cell: (Absorbs slinnkey android and transforms iinto a slinkey version of perfect Cell and slinkeys away)Duo: If you think that was odd, i don't blame you.QuatrŽ: Who are you talking to?Duo: All the people who will read this. It's being typed into a computer as we speak.QuatrŽ: Okay. Interesting. So now what do we do?Duo: We go to the drug store to get my film Developed.Bumm Bumm BummmmmmmmChapter 2: Duo gets his film developed 


	2. Duo gets his Film Developed

Chapter 2: Duo gets his film developedDuo: (Walks up to counter of a drug store with QuatrŽ) Heyyyyyy!!!!!!!! I'm here for my film!!!!!!!!!!!!!Piccolo: Just a second!!!!!!!!!!!!!!QuatrŽ: Since when does Piccolo work at the drug store?Duo: Ever since this fanfic started. QuatrŽ: I don't think you're resonsible enough to run this fic.Duo: Yeah but later on I'm gonna have you get married to Sailor Pluto..........but if I'm not responsible enough we can just keep thiings like they usually are and you can be a single loseer for the rest of your pitifull life.QuatrŽ: Fine have it your way. (Mumbles) You perv.Duo: I heard that!!!!!!QuatrŽ: Let's fight for the ruler of the fic!!!!!!!!Duo: Alright let's get our Gundams.QuatrŽ: No way, wwe're gonna fight man to man, or in your case man to woman.Duo: You Bastard! Bring it on!!!!!!!!!!!!Duo and QuatrŽ locked hands and started to thumb wrestle.Duo and QuatrŽ: One two three four!!!!!!! I declare a thumb war!!!!!!!!!!The two were in heated battle when Piccolo came outPiccolo: Uhh May I help you?The two stopped fighting and looked at Piccolo.Duo: Uhh yes. One, I need to pick upp my pictures. They're under maxwell. Two I need you to kill this guy!!!!!!!!!!!Piccolo: First things first! (Goes off to look for the pictures)QuatrŽ: Oh your to much of a wuss to fight me You need the help of a super strong Namek. Well two can play at THAT game.Duo: There's aanother game I knnow of were two people play......QuatrŽ: Uhh Sicko!!!!!!!!!!!!! Prepare to be destroyed!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Kneels ddown in a praying position) Please Pegasus, protector of dreams.....CRYSTAL TWINKLE BELL!!!!!!!!!!! (Holds a pink frilly bell over his head and rings it) Pegagsus crashes through the roof of the drug store and Piccolo comes running oout and kills it with Special Beam cannon.Piccolo: Here are your pictures. I'm sorry but I'll be fired if I kill any of my customers so i can't do that second thing. Your totall comes to 14 thousand dollars, iincluding the damage done to the roof.Duo: Uhh here ( hands Piccolo a potted plant) I pay in plants. See ya! (Runs out the door followed closley by an enraged QuatrŽ)Piccolo: (hugs the potted plant) I've alwways wanted one of these, ever siince I was inside Kami...and now I have one! I'm so happy!!!!! Suddenly the potted plant grows legs and runs away leaving Piccolo all alone in a ruined drug store.Piccolo: Goodbye cruel world. (Blasts himself with Special Beam Canon and dies)CHAPTER 3: Duo looks at his pictures 


	3. Duo looks at his pictures

CHAPTER 3: Duo looks at his picturesDuo and QuatrŽ arrive at duo's house hand in hand. They decided that the author should be the ruler of the fic.Duo opens the pictures to find they are all pic of Johnny Bravo flexing his muscles.Duo: Wahhh!!!! I got Johnny Bravo's pictures.QuatrŽ: Can I have um? I mean he's kiinda cool don't ya think?Duo: Wait! T.O.!! You like Sailor Pluto AND Johnny Bravo?QuatrŽ: Who says I like Sailor Pluto?Duo: Well It's obvious how your always drooling over her when Sailor Moon comes on.QuatrŽ: Well you stare at my butt all day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Duo: Do not!!!!!!QuatrŽ: Do Too!!!!Duo: DO NOT!!!!!!QuatrŽ: DO TOO!!!!!!!! Times fifty!!!!Duo: DO NOT!!!!!! Times one hundred!!!!!!QuatrŽ: DO TOO!!!!!!!! Times a billion!!!!!Duo: DO NOT!!!!!! Times infiinity!!!!!!!!QuatrŽ: DO TOO!!!!!!!! Times iinfinity pplus one!!!!!!!Duo: Yeah well DO NOT!!!!!! Times infiinity plus two!!!!!!!!!QuatrŽ: Always one step ahead.Author: Hey y'know, boys, if two people fight alot they really care for eachother!Duo and QuatrŽ: NOT TRUE!!!!!!!!!!Author: UH HUUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Duo and QuatrŽ: UH UHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!Author: UH HUUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Times infinity plus THREE!!!!!!!!!!! Beat That!!!Duo and QuatrŽ: Darn it!! Foiled again.Author: I'm gonna add a little spice to this fic.Android 17: Hey that's my line!!!!!Author: Go away! Your not allowed in this fic!!!!!!! (17 vanishes)I'm gonna add a very good character to make this more interesting.CHAPTER 4: The author adds a new character 


	4. The Author Adds A New Character

CHAPTER 4: The author adds a new characterVegeta suddenly appearsVegeta: Where am I?Duo: Oh no, not Vegeta! We better get out of here before the author and Vegeta really spice things up.17: SSSTOP USING MY LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!Author: Vegeta, will you get this android out of here?Vegeta: I take orders from no one!!!!!Author: If you do......I'll tell you how to get to Super Saiyan 4 (In a sing song voice)Vegeta: (Sends 17 to the next dimention) Now tell me, woman!!!!!!!!Author: You have to catch me first!!!!!!!! (Runs away giggling)Vegeta: EEEEEEEEErrrrrrrrrrr!!!!! Come back here baka woman!! (Runs after the author)Duo: Well......that was different.QuatrŽ: Duo, I have to tell you something.Duo: What?QuatrŽ: I......I.....-Suddenly the Mystery Machine crashed iinto Duo's living room. And the gang got out.Duo: Oh no, it's Freddy!QuatrŽ: What's wronge with that?Duo: Remeber last time there was a Freddy.......QuatrŽ: Oh yeah, Jay, right.Freddy: Hi guys, I'm Freddy!!Jay: (Catapaults himself at freddy holding that freaky sword from Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon.) Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!! Die Scummm!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Slices Freddy in half starting from between his legs and working up.) Mwahahahaha!!!!!!! Two Freddys down, one to go!!!!!!(Jay grabs freddy's intestines and takes a bite) hah, the bloody tatse of sucsess.Daphne: Oh no!!!!! Freddy!!!!! I didn't even get a chance to tell him how I felt. (Daphne faints and is gracefully caught by Shaggy)CHAPTER 5: Duo and QuatrŽ Meet the Flintstones 


	5. Duo and Quatré Meet the Flintstones

CHAPTER 5: Duo and QuatrŽ Meet the FlintstonesDuo: Why are we going to meet the flinstones?QuatrŽ: Yeah! I don't get it? What's the point of this fanfic anyway?Author: (Looks the other way) Just a second, we can finish later. (Looks at Duo and QuatrŽ from up in the godly clouds) The point of this fanfic is to........um....... I'm not really sure. YOu two are smart, figure it out for yourselves. (Goes back into the clouds. Some faint giggleing is heard from behind the cloud cover)Duo: Hey there's nothing else to do, why not visit the Flintstones?QuatrŽ: Yeah your right.Duo aand QuatrŽ arrive at the Flintstones to relize their mistake.Fred Flintston: Hi, welcome to my house.Duo: Hey QuatrŽ look at his name up there.QuatrŽ: So what it's just Fred.........OH SHOOT HERE HE COMESS!!!!!!!!!!!!!Jay: (Charges full force at Fred Flinstone holding a cuckoo clock) Mwaahahhahaha!!!!! Prepare to die!!!!!!!!!! YOu scum!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Fell my wwrath!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Hits Fred on the head repeadedly with a cuckoo clock, eeventually breaking his skull open. Fred's brains spill out over Jay's feet) Hah! Sweet sweet revenge! (Jay scoops up ssome of Freds braiin and putss it in his mouth) hey! dishh ish chewy!!!!! (Chews for about an hour untill he finally swallowes it) It's the Sailor Jupiter thing to do!Duo: Well........that was great...QuatrŽ: How come you alwaays talk first?Duo: Cuz I'm the main character.QuatrŽ: Who says?Duo: Just look aat the title of this fic!QuatrŽ: The Great Employer...............stale. Hey, you never actually employed anyone!Duo: Well who cares! Let's ask the author what we should do.QuatrŽ: She's probably too busy hitting on Vegeta.Duo: Yeah heh heh. Well let's ask if she's had any luck. HEY AUTHOR PERSON!!!!!!!!!!!!Author: What? Oh you can stop calling me author, call me Saiyan Chick.QuatrŽ: Yup, she definatly likes Vegeta. HEY!! I got to talk first!!!!! Cool!!Saiyan Chick: Shut up Catra!! (Talking like Connor)QuatrŽ: Hey you spelled my name wrong!Saiyan Chick: SHUT UP CATRA!!!! (Still talkiing like Connor)Duo: Who is Connor?Saiyan Chick: A booy from my school.QuatrŽ: Oh I bet you like him!!!!!! Kissy Kissy!!!!Saiyan Chick: I DON NOT!!!!!!!!! THE ONLY PERSON I LIKE IS VEGETA!!!!!!!!!!!!Duo: Oh really................I think you like 17.Saiyan Chick: Allright it's time for you to die!!!!!!!!!!!Duo: (Throws Mr. Fluffy Wuffy way up into the clouds at Saiyan Chick)QuatrŽ: Where did you get that from?Duo: I've been keeping it in my shirt.QuatrŽ: I'm NOT going to ask. I thought he was dead.Saiyan Chick: YOu're going to be dead. Luckilly I learned something from Vegeta that will come in handy right about now!!Duo: What? A butt forehead?Saiyan Chick: BIIIIIIGGGGGG...QuatrŽ aand Duo: She's gonna kill us! (Like Team Rocket)Saiyan Chick: BBBANNNGGGGGgGG!!!!!!!!!!!QuatrŽ aand Duo: She's gonna kill us! (Like Team Rocket)Saiyan Chick: AATTACCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!QuatrŽ and Duo: AhhhhhhHHHHHHHHhhhhhhHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! (Fly away into the sky)Duo and QuatrŽ are blastiing off again!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (A shimmer apears where they flew off too)CHAPTER 6: A look at what Jay does in his spare time (while not killing Freddy) 


	6. A Look At What Jay Does In His Spare Tim...

CHAPTER 6: A look at what Jay does in his spare time (while not killing Freddy)Jay (did I mention jay is 10 years old) and Sailor Jupiter were at Jupiters house.Jupiter is actually not in Sailor Scout form so she was actually Lita.Jay:Y'know what.Lita: What?Jay: I think you're hot.Lita: I know...hey I appreciate you killing all of those Freddys for me. I've hated Freddys ever since Freddy dumped me.Jay: No sweat.Lita: This is boring. Let's ask Saiyan Chick to make this more interestiing.Saiyan Chick: Wait a minute I'm busy!Jay: She and Vegeta are up there havin' fun.Saiyan Chick: Yup!!!!!!! ^_~ Hey me and Vegeta are gonna go i nthe hyperbolic time cchamber for a day/year so yo guys will have to live in this fanfic without my help.Well See ya!!!!! (Saiyan Chick dissapeared iin the clouds once again)Lita: Now what?Jay:..............................Lita: Are you thinking what I'm thinnking even though your only 10 years old?Jay: (Nods his head) mmmmm hmmmmm!!!!!!!!!Lita: Great!!!!! Let's get an ice cream!!!!!Jay: (Falls Over) Gaaaaaahh!!!!!!CHAPTER 7:Duo and QuatrŽ's return 


	7. Duo and Quatré's Return

CHAPTER 7:Duuo and QuatrŽ's returnDuo: We're baaaaack! Is she goone?QuatrŽ: Yup!! She went to train with Veggie in the Hyperbolic time chamber.Duo: Mwahahahayhahah!!!! Let's trash her room!!!!QuatrŽ: But we don't know where her house is!Duo: United States of America, Michigan, Washtenaw County, Ann Arbor, Cranbrook Road, 2710, the room at the end of the hallway.QuatrŽ: I'm not even going to try to understand how you know all of this.Duo: Intuition.QuatrŽ: Yeah great. But how are we going to get there?Duo: We'll sell all of my slinkeys and potted plants.QuatrŽ: Okay.Duo and QuatrŽ did just that and the next day they were on the plane.Duo: Hi.QuatrŽ: Why did you say that?Duo: So I could talk before you did.QuatrŽ: Sigh. Hey, speaking of sigh, isnt that Cye sittiing behind us?Duo: Yoou mean from the Ronin Warriors? Hah that show is so stupid and old.QuatrŽ: He would make a good entertainer, why don't you employ him?Duo: I've got it! I'll employ him!! I have the best ideas!!!!!!QuatrŽ: Sigh. But you gave all of your potted plants and slinkeys to Tokyo Airlines!Duo: But I don't have anymore potted plants or slinkeys.......QuatrŽ: We'll give him your collection of mummified Possums!!!!Duo: I've got it!!!!QuatrŽ: What?Duo: I'll give him my collection of mummified Possums!!!!!!!! But.......QuatrŽ: Buut what?Duo:I can't part with Fluffcatiooop!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Duo started to sob)QuatrŽ: Fluffcatiooop needs to see the world, he needs to move on, just like when kids go to collage...Duo: COLLAGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I never went collage!!!!!!!! Oh Mommy I'm a failure!!!!!!!!!!!!!QuatrŽ: It's okay It's okay. Your too smart for collage.Duo: Really?QuatrŽ: Really. Duo: Hold me. (QuatrŽ and Duo hugged)Everyone else in the airplane: Awwww how cute!!!!!!!!!Duo: (jerks up) what are all of you looking at?Everyone: (Look away and countinue on with their conversations)CHAPTER 8: Duo and QuatrŽ get what they deserve 


	8. Duo and Quatré get what They Deserve

CHAPTER 8: Duo and QuatrŽ get what they deserveQuatrŽ: We-Duo: Blah blah balh blah!!!!!!QuatrŽ: What was that for?Duo: You didn't finsh your sentence so you didn't tallk first!!!!!QuatrŽ: Yeah whatever. Anyway we sshould be reaching Michigan in about 15 minutes.Pilot: Hi everyone! (In a jolly voice) Guess what! We're gonna crash before we reach anywhere to land. By my calculations we will collide into the rocky Mountains because I forgot to refule before we took off. Sorry about the inconvieince. have a nice day.Everyone: Wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!! We're gonna crash.QuatrŽ: Hey-Duo: Blah blah balhQuatrŽ: Not Again!! Anyway we could call our GUndams and escape in them.Duo: Since when do we have remote controllers for our GUndams?QuatrŽ: Just as soon as Piccolo was hired at the Drug Store.Duo: Okay then, were are they?QuatrŽ: Whoops.Duo: (Grabs duo by the collar) You left them in Japan didn't you?QuatrŽ: Yup.Duo: Gaaaah! (Beats QuatrŽ with the seat cusion)Plane: Neeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!! (Crashes into the Rocky Mountains)Booooooooooooooommmmmmmm!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!CHAPTER 9: Out of the Time Chamber 


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